Fifo

[Fifo]

[sandersstudies]

Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!

Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: Yes your protagonist should have flaws but ultimately we should root for them and like them from the beginning :)

Charles Dickens: Here is the worst ugliest rudest meanest nastiest bitch you’ve ever met in your life.

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!

Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: It’s all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! It’s a character arc! It’s called growth! Readers love it!

Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row

[coldgoldlazarus]

[Fifo]

[greencore]

there's something so freeing about saying "i hope they die" and just moving on

[Fifo]

[sylviii]

reblog if you’re transgender, genderqueer, or if you think you could survive being hit with a 14” shell fired from a Pennsylvania-class battleship

[sylviii]

yes, you may reblog this post even if you’re not 100% sure you would survive a 14-inch shell

[Fifo]

[hymnsofheresy]

I think one of the most damaging ideologies towards children is the conviction that having children isn’t a calling but a moral obligation.

[hymnsofheresy]

Not to be a crazy radical or anything, but children deserve to be deeply wanted by their parents.

[hymnsofheresy]

Children shouldn’t be a “stage” in life that everyone is obligated to fulfill; childrearing is not for everyone. More importantly, children shouldn’t be state-enforced punishments for “irresponsible” sexual behavior.

Children are people with thoughts and feelings just like the rest of us. They are conscious of the way people treat them. And they can certainly tell when they are unwanted and/or resented.

[letomcfaceman]

[chaotic-queer-disaster]

[ID: tumblr tags. they are: #reblog #i also dont think its enough to want a child. i think you need to want a teenager and an adult too #my mom wanted a baby. when i was too old to pronounce spaghetti wrong and let her put me in church dresses she was done with me #my dad wanted a person. he wanted a baby a child a tween a teen and an adult #my dad wanted to watch a person happen. which was different. /end ID.]

[megpie71]

Boosting all of the above signal.

[Fifo]

[sigynpenniman]

I know everyone says it’s best to just stick to “said” as a dialogue tag bc it disappears and that’s true and I mostly do but I want to take a moment for my all-time favorite dialogue tag, “lied.” Absolutely nothing hits like “‘I’m here to help,’ he lied.” NOTHING.

[unamccormack]

ABSOLUTELY one of my favourites.

[doctor-yoshi-soul]

[Fifo]

[preservationofnormalcy]

I feel confident enough to post these now. A collection of all the existing posters after some edits from the other post that got 13k notes! These are full size/quality. Go nuts.

You may use them for wallpapers, tabletop campaigns, whatever. Consider tipping me (do people use kofi for that or tumblr's built in system? Let me know what you prefer) or buying a print or sticker here! If you do use them, let me know what for, or send pictures!

[the-necbromancer]

@wholesome-dragon-lady

[Fifo]

[debkorvelus]

I feel sorry for the old man, but it was stealing.  There is no apparently about it. Water is not free, it’s not a right to have it, and people pay must pay for it.  If a government gives a thing to you like utilities, its still not free because they take it from somewhere else, like in taxes.  

[nutsacktorturer]

[tulpa777]

my friend visiting my house: hey i’m thirsty can i get a glass of water

me:

[stormesandshowers]

Nestle isn’t gonna fuck you

[a-singular-canadian]

Also water IS a human right, it’s classified as one by the UN the only country that really disagrees with this is the United States

[hexthelex]

If I buy a loaf of bread, and then decide to make a sandwich for my friend from some of it, is this STEALING? Is my friend STEALING the bread I already PAID for in full? Is the bread seller entitled to receive compensation because I, the person who PAID ALREADY the full value of the bread they sell, decided to give away a portion of it (a portion from an already PAID FOR product).

When people say that capitalism rots your brain they aren’t kidding - this is literally a disease, one of the mind and soul, and it’s contagious, and it’s deadly… Luckily there is a cure:

Originally posted by furbearingbrick

[headspacedad]

to add wood to the fire, it should also be pointed out - her mother wasn’t stealing that water - she was paying for it. Because there’s a meter that reads how much water your household uses and the water company then charges you accordingly. She was -paying- for the water she was giving to the neighbor.

And still got shut down. Because this wasn’t about what was right and it wasn’t even about what was fair or fair trade - it was about punishment.

[geekandmisandry]

I’m apoplectic with rage that someone would call giving water, that they paid for, to someone else who could not afford water “theft”.

What a terrible husk you walk around in, an absolute shell of humanity with nothing inside.

[galadriel1010]

Also, even Nestle doesn’t agree with you. The full quote from that famous “Water isn’t a human right” article is as follows:

“I am the first one to say water is a human right. This human right is the five litres of water we need for our daily hydration and the 25 litres we need for minimum hygiene.

”This amount of water is the primary responsibility of every government to make available to every citizen of this world, but this amount of water accounts for 1.5% of the total water which is for all human usage.

“Where I have an issue is that the 98.5% of the water we are using, which is for everything else, is not a human right and because we treat it as one, we are using it in an irresponsible manner, although it is the most precious resource we have. Why? Because we don’t want to give any value to this water. And we know very well that if something doesn’t have a value, it’s human behaviour that we use it in an irresponsible manner.

So if you say “Water is not a human right” and are referring to its use for daily life, your opinions are more toxically capitalist than the former CEO of Nestlé.

[Fifo]

Like playing with boobs?

[captainkay]

Now you have a legit reason to do so.

Science has found that compressing the cells in breasts will decrease the chance of malignant cells growing in the tissue. So playing with boobs can help prevent breast cancer. So play with your boobs! Play with your partner’s boobs! It’s healthy!

[glitterystarseed]

Originally posted by animatedtext

[official-boob-posts]

official boob post

[Fifo]

[nitewrighter]

You know that whole trope where like, the protagonists get teleported up into the aliens’ spaceship or base or whatever and the alien appears to them only it doesn’t appear as it really looks like but rather, since it doesn’t want to scare the protagonists, it takes the form of something we find familiar and pleasing and is like, “I look like your dad or whatever–is this form okay?” Like I think about that trope a lot and I think like, what if the alien couldn’t pick out a form via telepathy and only had earth media to try and decide what form would scare its human guests least and be accepted almost immediately and honestly the more I think about it the more options for what form that might be are just really fun to me.

“I have chosen the form of your earth playwright and composer Lin-Manuel Miranda–do not be afraid. I come in peace.”

“Greetings. I am Glofnorbo of the cloud you call the ‘Pegasus Nebula.’ I have scanned your earth media from afar and empirically decided that you would find the form of the one known as Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson most pleasing. I have come to confer with your leaders.” 

“Do not be panic. I come in peace. I have assumed the form of your insectoid demigoddess ‘Hatsune Miku’ so that we may communicate peacefully without my true form horrifying you.” 

[nineprotons]

“It was decided that I would assume the form of your ‘Mister Rogers’ in order to best welcome your world to the galactic neighborhood without frightening your kind.”

[gentlemanbones]

“…So did your colleague take on the form of Jack Black for that reason too?”

“No, that is the actual Jack Black. We do not know how to make him leave.”

[the-haiku-bot]

“…So did your colleague

take on the form of Jack Black

for that reason too?”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[Fifo]

[ankle-beez]

ALT

HERE WE GO MOTHERFUCKERS